I just wanted to check-in and say that everything is going great and I am very pleased with myself.
I am making small goals every day and therefore they will lead to something big or not so big. Point is I am doing big things to be small. Make sense. Kind of. Yeah. Ok.
My goal today is to work out. I am starting at 20 minutes a day every day this week.
Anyway, my biggest tip to myself is to remember to "be prepared" I have found myself hungry, ready to eat without a MediFast meal or healthy snack anywhere to be found. Don't do this! It makes you feel yucky and sets you back.
Although it takes longer I really take the time to plan out my day, plan for all scenarios so that I can continue to make smart and healthy decisions.
Off to work out!
YAY!!
Monday, December 5, 2011
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
I'm back!
I am back and ready to go! Thanksgiving was rough for so many reasons. I am thankful for so much and that I got to share the holiday with those I love most, but so thankful that it's over too!
I got on the scale on Monday and DIED!! Then came back and here I am. Fat and unhappy. I want to put it out there in the universe how much I weigh and therefore stating how much I have to lose, but I can't. I just can't do that to myself or embarrass my loved ones like that.
Needless to say I have lost 3 pounds since Monday and I am going strong. Thank you Medifast for making yummy tasty meals. Thank you for being there when I need you. Thank you for making this super difficult time for me easier. Let's just say I am 10, yes, 10 pounds less than when I was 9 months pregnant! Scary!! How did I let this happen? How come I didn't stop it? How come I didn't do anything sooner?
I remember seeing an overweight person with my family and them just being completely disgusted and asking "how could they let them self get so fat!?!?" Well now I know and it's easy, getting fat is easy and it happens so fast. It's hard to lose weight and I can definitely sympathize with that.
For me the the first step in losing weight it to set a goal, a feasible one, and a goal meant for yourself and no one else.
I will lose 50 pounds by Thanksgiving 2012.
Then you need to think of things that motivate you to obtain your goal. Here is my list of motivations! Not in order of importance.
Another thing that I need to remind myself of is yesterday was picture day at my work and I saw the pics and I was in complete and utter disgust after seeing myself!!!
K here we go. I'm back!!
I couldn't help but feel like this guy when I saw my pic yesterday! UGH!!
I got on the scale on Monday and DIED!! Then came back and here I am. Fat and unhappy. I want to put it out there in the universe how much I weigh and therefore stating how much I have to lose, but I can't. I just can't do that to myself or embarrass my loved ones like that.
Needless to say I have lost 3 pounds since Monday and I am going strong. Thank you Medifast for making yummy tasty meals. Thank you for being there when I need you. Thank you for making this super difficult time for me easier. Let's just say I am 10, yes, 10 pounds less than when I was 9 months pregnant! Scary!! How did I let this happen? How come I didn't stop it? How come I didn't do anything sooner?
I remember seeing an overweight person with my family and them just being completely disgusted and asking "how could they let them self get so fat!?!?" Well now I know and it's easy, getting fat is easy and it happens so fast. It's hard to lose weight and I can definitely sympathize with that.
For me the the first step in losing weight it to set a goal, a feasible one, and a goal meant for yourself and no one else.
I will lose 50 pounds by Thanksgiving 2012.
Then you need to think of things that motivate you to obtain your goal. Here is my list of motivations! Not in order of importance.
- I have a beautiful daughter who deserves a beautiful mom.
- I have tonz of cute clothes that I have spent good money on that I can't wear. I want to look cute again.
- I want to be someone that my partner is proud of being seen with. (disclaimer: he never leads me to believe otherwise, so this motivation really is for me.)
- I want to look good in pictures and not want to hurl every time I see a pic of myself.
- I want to be healthy and get off my blood pressure meds.
Another thing that I need to remind myself of is yesterday was picture day at my work and I saw the pics and I was in complete and utter disgust after seeing myself!!!
K here we go. I'm back!!
I couldn't help but feel like this guy when I saw my pic yesterday! UGH!!
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Uh Oh!
I LOVE Take Shape for Life! I do. I know that it works. I followed it faithfully and have lost weight. Then my sister was in town!! Ugh!! Which meant lunch with "the girls" and family dinners. This is hard for me! Because I am not strong enough yet to say "no" to treats and carbs. I enjoy losing weight though and I kept reminding myself of that. I do much better on the plan during the week when I work, eat my meals, go home, do my house chores and eat my lean and green. I just do much better when I don't surround myself with all the tempting unhealthy food that I once devoured and all too much. I decided to cancel my bunco playing group until I am stronger. I have also avoided a few parties too. I don't feel bad about it, in fact, I am actually quite proud of myself for knowing what my goal is and sticking to it. Even though I got a little off track while my sister was here I learned some valuable lessons.
The awesome thing about Take Shape for Life is:
It's easy to get back on track.
T.S.F.L. really is a forgiving plan.
I eat slower, therefore getting full sooner and not eating as much.
I now order half of what I normally would when I go out.
I am drinking tonz more water.
I am losing weight!!
And even though I didn't follow the plan as closely when my sister was here I maintained my weight! Woo hoo!!!
Some days are harder than others. For example, if I am tired and not thinking clearly I want to make unwise decisions. Sleep is very important and I know many of us aren't getting near enough. I am going to make a conscious effort to go to be in bed by 10:30 every weeknight!!
I am also going to stay focused on my goal!!
Here we go!!
The awesome thing about Take Shape for Life is:
It's easy to get back on track.
T.S.F.L. really is a forgiving plan.
I eat slower, therefore getting full sooner and not eating as much.
I now order half of what I normally would when I go out.
I am drinking tonz more water.
I am losing weight!!
And even though I didn't follow the plan as closely when my sister was here I maintained my weight! Woo hoo!!!
Some days are harder than others. For example, if I am tired and not thinking clearly I want to make unwise decisions. Sleep is very important and I know many of us aren't getting near enough. I am going to make a conscious effort to go to be in bed by 10:30 every weeknight!!
I am also going to stay focused on my goal!!
Here we go!!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Day 3 - 7 ~ TSFL
Well I have to say that I am LOVING this plan!!! I am down 6.6 pounds and it's only day 7.
The weekend was a little tricky because I have the ability to do whatever I want - different from being an office slave Monday thru Friday, but I still managed to stay on the plan and do well.
For me the plan is easier to follow during the week because I just stay in the office and get to eat what I have in my desk - all my awesome Medi-fast meals. There are no outside influences, the pantry or the freezer at home. Know what I mean?
For breakfast I continued to have the cappuccino or add a shake flavor to my coffee - delish!! Then I eat a bar, puffs or shake - whatever I feel at the moment. On Saturday I switched my Lean and Green from dinner to lunch time since we decided to go on a picnic.
If I can continue to stay "on the wagon" during the weekend anyone can and here is why??? My partner is the worst and I mean the worst person to eat healthy with. Here is why:
All the hard work that you have already put in would have been a waste and the thought of "starting over" is not appealing. Just remind yourself how far you have come. 1 day is already a step closer to your goal!!
Remember your goal(s).
And remember, just remember how freaking awesome it feels to see the pounds on that scale go down. There is not many things that are better right now. That to me is an awesome reward and reminder of how awesome this wellness plan is and how freakin' awesome the human body is. The body is SO forgiving!! I think of all the crap I have put into my body and yet it forgives me when I give it "healthy fuel" and it repays me by repairing itself and shedding my excess FAT!!
What if our body was not so forgiving? It wants the same thing for us. To weigh less, to look and feel fantastic!!!
We can get healthy. We can look great again. We can feel our best.
We can Take Shape for Life.
What a cool, cool feeling!?!?
I am pumped and will only continue. YAY!!!
The weekend was a little tricky because I have the ability to do whatever I want - different from being an office slave Monday thru Friday, but I still managed to stay on the plan and do well.
For me the plan is easier to follow during the week because I just stay in the office and get to eat what I have in my desk - all my awesome Medi-fast meals. There are no outside influences, the pantry or the freezer at home. Know what I mean?
For breakfast I continued to have the cappuccino or add a shake flavor to my coffee - delish!! Then I eat a bar, puffs or shake - whatever I feel at the moment. On Saturday I switched my Lean and Green from dinner to lunch time since we decided to go on a picnic.
If I can continue to stay "on the wagon" during the weekend anyone can and here is why??? My partner is the worst and I mean the worst person to eat healthy with. Here is why:
- I Heart Beer! And my loving partner continues to devour multiples in front of me on a daily basis. He also did this my entire pregnancy so this is not new news, but come on!!!
- He adds butter and cheese to all his dishes!! I LOVE cheese.
- He makes everything look SO tasty!!! Hence the cheese and butter.
- He doesn't give a crap that I am wanting to eat less and healthier and he continues eats his truck driver portions RIGHT in front of me.
- If I can continue success on this wellness program with the Food Devil devouring whatever their devilish heart desires in front of me - you can too!!!
- THANK GOODNESS for a Free Health Coach - especially during this crucial time!
- I am focused on my goal and have remained focused.
- I remind myself that I will look damn good in my jeans while the Food Devil is wearing sweatpants the rest of his existence - until he pulls his head out and gets in this awesome health bandwagon.
All the hard work that you have already put in would have been a waste and the thought of "starting over" is not appealing. Just remind yourself how far you have come. 1 day is already a step closer to your goal!!
Remember your goal(s).
And remember, just remember how freaking awesome it feels to see the pounds on that scale go down. There is not many things that are better right now. That to me is an awesome reward and reminder of how awesome this wellness plan is and how freakin' awesome the human body is. The body is SO forgiving!! I think of all the crap I have put into my body and yet it forgives me when I give it "healthy fuel" and it repays me by repairing itself and shedding my excess FAT!!
What if our body was not so forgiving? It wants the same thing for us. To weigh less, to look and feel fantastic!!!
We can get healthy. We can look great again. We can feel our best.
We can Take Shape for Life.
What a cool, cool feeling!?!?
I am pumped and will only continue. YAY!!!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Day 2 ~ TSFL
I woke up this morning feeling great. Got ready for work, got here and drank a cappuccino and it was actually quite delicious.
I also drank 16 ounces of water because I could feel the hunger coming on. Then when it came time for my second meal of the day I decided to make the Chocolate Chip Pancakes with Sugar Free Syrup. It was a nice meal and tasted quite delicious. I heated up the syrup too!!
BUT here is what I learned with making the pancakes this morning:
Food is SOOOOO psychological therefore instead of having shakes today I decided best to eat a bar, chili and pancakes versus - food that appears to have more substance. Although the shakes are delicious! I just know that when you go through the actions of eating it puts your mind as ease.
I did get a headache and took some ibuprofen for it - that helped!
On my way home I am going shopping for the veggies on "the list". I have my fish thawing out as we speak. It's a great idea to plan your dinner or Lean and Green in advance so that you don't make irrational decisions and then you can visualize your yummy Lean and Green meal! That helps me get through the late afternoon as well.
YAY!! Another day down.
Oh and I saved the best news for last. I lost 2 pounds!!
I also drank 16 ounces of water because I could feel the hunger coming on. Then when it came time for my second meal of the day I decided to make the Chocolate Chip Pancakes with Sugar Free Syrup. It was a nice meal and tasted quite delicious. I heated up the syrup too!!
BUT here is what I learned with making the pancakes this morning:
- If you are really hungry don't attempt to make a meal grab - a bar or a shake. I waited until I was really hungry and I made a huge mess - pancakes all over me, all over my work's break room, it was just a mess because I was not thinking clearly.
- You need to use a non-stick pan or PAM in the pan to make the pancakes.
- Follow the mixing directions on the package exactly - at least the first time any way.
Food is SOOOOO psychological therefore instead of having shakes today I decided best to eat a bar, chili and pancakes versus - food that appears to have more substance. Although the shakes are delicious! I just know that when you go through the actions of eating it puts your mind as ease.
I did get a headache and took some ibuprofen for it - that helped!
On my way home I am going shopping for the veggies on "the list". I have my fish thawing out as we speak. It's a great idea to plan your dinner or Lean and Green in advance so that you don't make irrational decisions and then you can visualize your yummy Lean and Green meal! That helps me get through the late afternoon as well.
YAY!! Another day down.
Oh and I saved the best news for last. I lost 2 pounds!!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Day 1 ~ TSFL
Today is my FIRST day of doing the Take Shape for Life Wellness Program. I received my food yesterday, went through it all and picked out my food for the rest of the work week. It was actually fun for me because I feel like I still have choices on what I can eat.
The Medifast food that I ordered is all stuff that I like - Parmesan cheese puffs, chocolate, chili, etc. Then I also get to sit down with my family in the evening for dinner and have my Lean and Green meal. We will all be indulging in the Lean and Green Meal which consists of a lean protein (chicken, steak, fish, lobster, shrimp, roast turkey or beef) and vegetables (peppers, squash, tomatoes, zucchini, cabbage, spinach, cauliflower, broccoli, etc.). It's important for my family and I to share in happy, healthy meals together.
I will have to drink lots of water which is easy for me as I LOVE water and know all of it's wonderful benefits. For those that don't like water I feel bad because it truly is SOOOOO good for you. Though I will admit when having to drink tonz of water I mix it up by throwing a lemon, lime or even those drink packets in there and it makes it less "boring" to drink. Thankfully Medifast has those drink packets available and I can't wait to taste them.
I am just thrilled and excited to start the program and watch my body transform and obtaining Optimal Health.
I went to the doctor yesterday for my High Blood pressure and the doc renewed my prescription. I told her about the Wellness Program and she said that it sounded like a good plan and that she would like to see me lose weight, get in shape and get off my meds!!
Well I am happy to report that today is going great. If I feel a headache come on I just drink some water, get out of the office lighting for a minute and I feel better.
I just keeping thinking about how I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I want to look hot and feel awesome for myself, for Maizy and for my awesome partner!!
Cheers!
The Medifast food that I ordered is all stuff that I like - Parmesan cheese puffs, chocolate, chili, etc. Then I also get to sit down with my family in the evening for dinner and have my Lean and Green meal. We will all be indulging in the Lean and Green Meal which consists of a lean protein (chicken, steak, fish, lobster, shrimp, roast turkey or beef) and vegetables (peppers, squash, tomatoes, zucchini, cabbage, spinach, cauliflower, broccoli, etc.). It's important for my family and I to share in happy, healthy meals together.
I will have to drink lots of water which is easy for me as I LOVE water and know all of it's wonderful benefits. For those that don't like water I feel bad because it truly is SOOOOO good for you. Though I will admit when having to drink tonz of water I mix it up by throwing a lemon, lime or even those drink packets in there and it makes it less "boring" to drink. Thankfully Medifast has those drink packets available and I can't wait to taste them.
I am just thrilled and excited to start the program and watch my body transform and obtaining Optimal Health.
I went to the doctor yesterday for my High Blood pressure and the doc renewed my prescription. I told her about the Wellness Program and she said that it sounded like a good plan and that she would like to see me lose weight, get in shape and get off my meds!!
Well I am happy to report that today is going great. If I feel a headache come on I just drink some water, get out of the office lighting for a minute and I feel better.
I just keeping thinking about how I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I want to look hot and feel awesome for myself, for Maizy and for my awesome partner!!
Cheers!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Take Shape for Life
So.............. I am still fat and not happy. BUT. I am happy to report that I am starting a new Wellness Program called Take Shape for Life AND I am also a health coach!!! I will be promoting the tools, offer support and assist others in the same boat as me. Not only do I want to shed some poundage I also want to be healthy for me. For Maizy. YAY for health.
So in addition to the Wellness Program we use Medifast as a tool to shed the pounds. I have been anxiously awaiting for my delivery of meals!! I track the package about, um, maybe 5 times a day.
I am passionate about health. losing weight and just feeling and looking our best. I haven't been there for quite some time. I also an so enthused to be a health coach and want to get people on my health band wagon!!
I will keep all my updates on this blog. I will praise my successes and learn from my losses!!
I just tracked my package and, well, let me track it one more time............
YAY!!!!!! It's here. It's here. It's really here!!
Here we go! I can't wait to get home tonight and read all my food labels and learn more and more about Take Shape for Life!!
I am really excited about this journey.
So in addition to the Wellness Program we use Medifast as a tool to shed the pounds. I have been anxiously awaiting for my delivery of meals!! I track the package about, um, maybe 5 times a day.
I am passionate about health. losing weight and just feeling and looking our best. I haven't been there for quite some time. I also an so enthused to be a health coach and want to get people on my health band wagon!!
I will keep all my updates on this blog. I will praise my successes and learn from my losses!!
I just tracked my package and, well, let me track it one more time............
YAY!!!!!! It's here. It's here. It's really here!!
Here we go! I can't wait to get home tonight and read all my food labels and learn more and more about Take Shape for Life!!
I am really excited about this journey.
- Tuesday, 10/04/2011 at 10:50 A.M.
- Rear Door
Thursday, September 22, 2011
WTF!?!?
Ok I have never been known as a patient person or do I declare to be one. I have been working out good and hard for the last 2 1/2 weeks. I do love how I feel while do it, but like I mentioned before the after math is quite tricky - sweaty, stinky, red face and crazy hair while at work is not the greatest. I just fear when someone comes near me is all. Ugh!
Anywho, on my scale in the bathroom you can track your weight and it tells you how much you have lost - not in my case - or gained.
Well Maizy was playing on it and it switched to my profile and showed my weight back from when I was doing HCG. I had lost 13 pounds on the 2 weeks I did HCG and have since gained 20 pounds. You do the math. I am fat!
I just keep telling myself that it's all going to just fall off, that's right just fall off or melt away if you will, all at once. In the meantime I will continue to be a sweaty bitch 3-4 times a week.
Anywho, on my scale in the bathroom you can track your weight and it tells you how much you have lost - not in my case - or gained.
Well Maizy was playing on it and it switched to my profile and showed my weight back from when I was doing HCG. I had lost 13 pounds on the 2 weeks I did HCG and have since gained 20 pounds. You do the math. I am fat!
I just keep telling myself that it's all going to just fall off, that's right just fall off or melt away if you will, all at once. In the meantime I will continue to be a sweaty bitch 3-4 times a week.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
UGH!!!
So I have worked out lots of times now and still have not lost any weight! But it could be the fact that Michael made yummy brownies from scratch this weekend and I drank X number of beers last night while we watched the roast of Charlie Sheen.
This weight loss thing is hard and it's definitely harder the older I get. Not like this is some kind of news flash I guess I just had to discover all of this by myself! UGH!!
I have not told anyone except for this blog that I have started working out on my lunch breaks at least 3 times a week, but I am not feeling any benefits, but I am not going to give up - not yet anyway.
I am still tired and even more so at night.
I have bad hair the latter part of the rest of the work day.
I have the pleasure of wearing my grubbies in the halls at work and running into the execs. Nice!
I am S.O.R.E.
I am still fat.
I want plastic surgery to get rid of my fat!!!!
This weight loss thing is hard and it's definitely harder the older I get. Not like this is some kind of news flash I guess I just had to discover all of this by myself! UGH!!
I have not told anyone except for this blog that I have started working out on my lunch breaks at least 3 times a week, but I am not feeling any benefits, but I am not going to give up - not yet anyway.
I am still tired and even more so at night.
I have bad hair the latter part of the rest of the work day.
I have the pleasure of wearing my grubbies in the halls at work and running into the execs. Nice!
I am S.O.R.E.
I am still fat.
I want plastic surgery to get rid of my fat!!!!
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Workout Shmurkout!!
So I started working out a week and a half ago on my work lunches and am having a million mixed emotions!!
I know it's good for me, but I am SUPER tired and sore.
I have gained 4 pounds!! Yes 4 pounds since working my ass off.
I have more energy, but it's sporadic!
I am gross and sweaty at work the rest of the day.
I can't stop since I know it's good for me.
It's embarrassing to walk the halls of the office in my super hero tee, sweaty with a red face like a school boy at recess.
I am sick of being a fatty mcfatty, so I will give this another week or two and I am sure I will get addicted and won't be able to stop - that's my goal.
I want to have another baby and I refuse to be overweight like I was in the beginning. I refuse to go back to the hospital 5 days after giving birth and I refuse to be a fat mom.
Maizy is SO beautiful and perfect and she deserves a cute little mom! I am going to try my hardest. Plus I want us all to live a healthy life and I need to lead by way of example.
Wish me luck for the hundredth time.
I know it's good for me, but I am SUPER tired and sore.
I have gained 4 pounds!! Yes 4 pounds since working my ass off.
I have more energy, but it's sporadic!
I am gross and sweaty at work the rest of the day.
I can't stop since I know it's good for me.
It's embarrassing to walk the halls of the office in my super hero tee, sweaty with a red face like a school boy at recess.
I am sick of being a fatty mcfatty, so I will give this another week or two and I am sure I will get addicted and won't be able to stop - that's my goal.
I want to have another baby and I refuse to be overweight like I was in the beginning. I refuse to go back to the hospital 5 days after giving birth and I refuse to be a fat mom.
Maizy is SO beautiful and perfect and she deserves a cute little mom! I am going to try my hardest. Plus I want us all to live a healthy life and I need to lead by way of example.
Wish me luck for the hundredth time.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Blah blah blah!!!
I remember being younger and just wanting to be so grown-up and now that I am grown-up I want to be young SO bad. The ONLY thing I like about being grown-up is my daughter. I LOVE knowing her and being with her and watching her grow and see her explosive personality come to life and see her eyes light up at some of life's simplicity since there is not much of it. She is the only thing that keeps me going and what a good job she is doing because believe me I want to give up on an hourly basis. It takes everything I have to stay put in my chair and not leaving screaming "FUCK YOU!! And you and you!!!!!"
Being a grown up fucking sucks. I hate paying bills. Working wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for someone else and on there conditions. I have to wake up early, wash my hair and look somewhat presentable while I would much rather stay in my jammies. I have to cook, clean and buy my own food. I have to wash and fold my own laundry and frankly that is the chore that blows the most. I have to drive a car that I bought myself, pay for my own gas and pay my sky rocketing car and health insurance. Who the fuck thinks when they are a kid "gosh I hope I have a great medical, dental and great 401k plan when I'm old." This grown up thing really, fucking sucks!! And you don't get to see your friends on a daily basis. Now your friends are old getting plastic surgery and botox and are too busy to talk to one other about daily life and their secret crush!! Now it's all about how gravity is no longer our friend and how we hate our jobs but we have to work to barely keep our heads above water. Now that I am old my hangovers last days when they used to be nonexistent. WTF!?!?!?!
I will try my damnest to try to explain all the awesomeness that comes with being a kid and the minimal responsibilities to Maizy. She will be here soon enough but how do I explain this to her when my parents tried to do the same and I was like "shut the fuck up, so I can go rally your car, get drunk and kiss random boys!!!"
Being a grown up fucking sucks. I hate paying bills. Working wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for someone else and on there conditions. I have to wake up early, wash my hair and look somewhat presentable while I would much rather stay in my jammies. I have to cook, clean and buy my own food. I have to wash and fold my own laundry and frankly that is the chore that blows the most. I have to drive a car that I bought myself, pay for my own gas and pay my sky rocketing car and health insurance. Who the fuck thinks when they are a kid "gosh I hope I have a great medical, dental and great 401k plan when I'm old." This grown up thing really, fucking sucks!! And you don't get to see your friends on a daily basis. Now your friends are old getting plastic surgery and botox and are too busy to talk to one other about daily life and their secret crush!! Now it's all about how gravity is no longer our friend and how we hate our jobs but we have to work to barely keep our heads above water. Now that I am old my hangovers last days when they used to be nonexistent. WTF!?!?!?!
I will try my damnest to try to explain all the awesomeness that comes with being a kid and the minimal responsibilities to Maizy. She will be here soon enough but how do I explain this to her when my parents tried to do the same and I was like "shut the fuck up, so I can go rally your car, get drunk and kiss random boys!!!"
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Yeah yeah yeah!!!
So I am fat. What gives!?!? I want to talk about other shit too!!! I do want to be skinny, but obviously not bad enough if I am not doing anything about it.
I have been here many times. I want to be skinny. So either I get pissed off enough at my fatness that I do something about it or I just bitch and cry silently to myself at night.
The last time I was really successful at losing weight everything else was going superb. Know what I mean? I lived in a beautiful house, my house was always clean, I loved my job, I thought I was in love, I was getting married, I had money to spend on darling clothes, I worked with young, fun girls that we motivated each other, talked about young love and fashion.
Well now I have a beautiful extraordinary daughter, a kind and loving partner, a house that needs some TLC, I hate my boss with a fucking passion and she hates me and see as how I am at work most of my time it makes me miserable, I am the breadwinner for my family which adds a lot of stress, I have no fun co-workers to talk to and I am SUPER tired 24/7. This should be the time of my life. I should say fuck it to everyone and just cherish what's important, but I can't seem too. HELP!!!!!
I need to get in shape before Michael will ever impregnate me again but I guess until we are ready and it's crunch time I may do just that.
But for now I will bitch about being fat, not cute and not wanting to change. I will just enjoy my daughter and my partner for now until I decide I want to change for me, or Maizy says "my momma so fat................"
Peace.
I have been here many times. I want to be skinny. So either I get pissed off enough at my fatness that I do something about it or I just bitch and cry silently to myself at night.
The last time I was really successful at losing weight everything else was going superb. Know what I mean? I lived in a beautiful house, my house was always clean, I loved my job, I thought I was in love, I was getting married, I had money to spend on darling clothes, I worked with young, fun girls that we motivated each other, talked about young love and fashion.
Well now I have a beautiful extraordinary daughter, a kind and loving partner, a house that needs some TLC, I hate my boss with a fucking passion and she hates me and see as how I am at work most of my time it makes me miserable, I am the breadwinner for my family which adds a lot of stress, I have no fun co-workers to talk to and I am SUPER tired 24/7. This should be the time of my life. I should say fuck it to everyone and just cherish what's important, but I can't seem too. HELP!!!!!
I need to get in shape before Michael will ever impregnate me again but I guess until we are ready and it's crunch time I may do just that.
But for now I will bitch about being fat, not cute and not wanting to change. I will just enjoy my daughter and my partner for now until I decide I want to change for me, or Maizy says "my momma so fat................"
Peace.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
I'm down, I'm up, I'm down!!
Well that is how my emotions are, but I am happy to report that my weight is down, has stayed down and continues to go down. YAY!!!! I am down 10 pounds. It has been a long, hard road. This has been one of the hardest weeks I've had in a long time. It's interesting what a psychological part of eating is. It may not be the same for everyone, but it is definitely me. Food soothes me, calms me, reduces my stress and I thoroughly enjoy it!
This also been a hard week too. I have completely finished breastfeeding and pumping and am in MAJOR pain! Plus I am sure I have hormones galore going on.
We went to a wedding Saturday night and it was the first time since my diet that I was around "food". It was really tempting not to just eat some and see how much remorse I would feel. They served Chinese food which is one of my faves. Then the cake, oh my gosh the cake, there was one layer that was chocolate with a fudge middle, it looked delish!!! Michael didn't get any luckily or I might have had a taste!!
That saying, "Nothing tastes as good as thin" is SO true. I bought a new shirt a few weeks back and couldn't fit in to it. I thought to give it another try and I wore it yesterday and it looked great.
I have noticed the weight loss in my face and my back - I have less back fat!! YAY!!!
If I can do this diet anyone can. One thing that has helped is having my meat prepared and ready to go in the mornings. Michael has been a big support which is great! And then I also found the DIYHCG FaceBook page and they have lots of recipe and meal ideas.
I think the may thing to do on HCG is get creative with your meals, so that you don't get bored and make stupid rash eating choices. I also researched the maintenance on this diet and I think it'll be relatively easy because A) I won't want to gain any weight back and B) There is nothing wrong with eating completely healthy. I want to be a good example to my daughter and I don't her to have a weight problem.
I can have wedding cake, candy, popcorn and peanut butter rice crispy treats BUT in moderation!! There is nothing wrong with that concept at all!!!
It's all what you KNOW! And I KNOW I am enjoying this weight loss thing.
This also been a hard week too. I have completely finished breastfeeding and pumping and am in MAJOR pain! Plus I am sure I have hormones galore going on.
We went to a wedding Saturday night and it was the first time since my diet that I was around "food". It was really tempting not to just eat some and see how much remorse I would feel. They served Chinese food which is one of my faves. Then the cake, oh my gosh the cake, there was one layer that was chocolate with a fudge middle, it looked delish!!! Michael didn't get any luckily or I might have had a taste!!
That saying, "Nothing tastes as good as thin" is SO true. I bought a new shirt a few weeks back and couldn't fit in to it. I thought to give it another try and I wore it yesterday and it looked great.
I have noticed the weight loss in my face and my back - I have less back fat!! YAY!!!
If I can do this diet anyone can. One thing that has helped is having my meat prepared and ready to go in the mornings. Michael has been a big support which is great! And then I also found the DIYHCG FaceBook page and they have lots of recipe and meal ideas.
I think the may thing to do on HCG is get creative with your meals, so that you don't get bored and make stupid rash eating choices. I also researched the maintenance on this diet and I think it'll be relatively easy because A) I won't want to gain any weight back and B) There is nothing wrong with eating completely healthy. I want to be a good example to my daughter and I don't her to have a weight problem.
I can have wedding cake, candy, popcorn and peanut butter rice crispy treats BUT in moderation!! There is nothing wrong with that concept at all!!!
It's all what you KNOW! And I KNOW I am enjoying this weight loss thing.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
This sucks!!
Today is my fourth day doing HCG and I am down 5.4 pounds, so I am going to keep going. This has been very difficult for me the last couple of days. Day 1 and 2 weren't so bad. The headaches have been bad, my anxiety has risen but I want this!! I want to be thin!!! I will keep going. The meals are actually quite tasty and I love the fresh ingredients that are used. the meals are just small and there aren't very many of them. Quite the transition when you go from eating whenever and whatever you want!!
The point is not for me to moan and groan but to say that I KNOW it's going to be challenging but it can and will be done!! I will be thin! I can already tell a difference in my face. My second chin is almost gone!!
My motivation for all of this is my daughter. She is the light of my life and she deserves a skinny, fun, cute mom!! My inspiration is my sister. She did amazing at it! And she still continues to do it and looks amazing!!
Today at work a lady offered me a brownie!!! I declined- that's huge for me!!
Well her we go!!
The point is not for me to moan and groan but to say that I KNOW it's going to be challenging but it can and will be done!! I will be thin! I can already tell a difference in my face. My second chin is almost gone!!
My motivation for all of this is my daughter. She is the light of my life and she deserves a skinny, fun, cute mom!! My inspiration is my sister. She did amazing at it! And she still continues to do it and looks amazing!!
Today at work a lady offered me a brownie!!! I declined- that's huge for me!!
Well her we go!!
Monday, April 11, 2011
I KNOW I don't want to be fat anymore!
I am pretty fed up with myself for being fat and just not caring. I have let myself eat and drink whatever I wanted ever since I brought Maizy into this world. I have devoured delicious and memorable meals and I never thought or cared much about the consequences WELL now I do!!
I have decided to particpate in the HCG diet. I have done it before but only half-assed and still lost weight. This time I am going to follow it exact and have great success.
I had an eye opening experience. I was at the store and saw this darling baby with a big fat mom and realized I don't want to be that. Maizy is super adorable, fun, energetic, darling and she deserves a mom all the same!!
I plan to write all about my experience, ups and downs but I know the end result will be great. My sister did the HCG with much success and I know that if she can do it, I can too!!
This morning I woke up hungry, have a headache and am starving!! But this too shall pass.
Here we go!!!!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)